Meeting the Grandmas

Today was a very interesting day. We started off by waking up at 6am because one of the cell phones alarms was accidentally still set and we couldn’t get back to sleep so I am pretty tired right now. It is about 8:45pm. Then we packed up our stuff and moved to the apartment. It has a small kitchen w/table, living room with door to close when kids are sleeping, hallway/entry, tiny bathroom/big blue tub, and a bedroom where Joey and I will sleep. It is definitely decent and we can cook and do laundry but of course I am having a hard time adjusting. I wish I did better with stuff like that. I just have a hard time using other people’s stuff so even though her house is really clean, I went around with wet wipes (thank you Brittany) and disinfected remotes, counters, light switches and stuff like that. I know I am kind of weird. Whatever.
We then proceeded to Jones’ orphanage to spend some time with him before he leaves for camp. The kids go to camp for 2 months. We will of course pick him up from there but the date keeps getting pushed back. We are now thinking of picking him up on Friday just to give him this last bit of fun at camp with his friends and he gets to be “by the sea” as Tatiana says it. It will also give us time to adapt to Mollie and her schedule first. I feel okay because we have been able to explain things to Jones so he knows what is coming. Mollie has no idea so she will have to live it to understand. I also don’t want Jones to feel uncomfortable if Mollie is inconsolable or something. He is very protective of her. At the orphanage he played with his friends and we brought snacks for him to share but when they started grabbing some he flipped out and chased them down trying to hit them and he was crying. I asked Tatiana to please tell him we would like him to share but she said he doesn’t have a problem sharing but he is upset because they did not ask permission. I understand. This also happened with the toys. He ran around the back of the building crying. This was my first opportunity as comforter. I went and picked him up and held him. He started to grin and then would fake cry for more. This was a test I think for him to see how I would be there so I caved into it to a point. Next…………..
SURPRISE! What? His Grandma has been visiting him ( we didn’t know this, we were told no one visited but I guess they were talking about Mollie when they told us that) and she showed up with the Great-Grandma! They were both very tearful but very kind. They expressed through Tatiana that they have mixed feelings. They are going to miss him so much but they just cannot afford to raise him and they believe he should have a father and mother. They cried, I cried, we hugged. She would like me to call a couple times a year. We don’t have to but I probably will. Jones greeted her and introduced us to her as Mama & Papa. This is a HUGE step, especially to his family! He also introduced us that way to his friends and caregivers. He also said he is going to live in a different country and he sounded proud. Wow, someone must have told him, but I am very glad. His Grandma gave me pictures of Jones growing up and guess what? The original referral picture we received of Mollie was not Mollie- it was Jones!!! No wonder it didn’t look like her! They also gave us a picture of his father. Very handsome & young. She explained that he died 3 years ago. He was very healthy but was out walking or running and something just happened with his heart and he died instantly. Let’s pray this isn’t hereditary. Anyway- so this must mean that the kids have different fathers. This also explains why Mollie has no visitors but Jones does.
We went inside the orphanage and were able to see his locker, playroom, table, bathroom, and bedroom. All very large, clean, and colorful. Very warm and inviting and looked very fun. Really nice looking. I will try to post pics. I was impressed. I am hoping he is okay with leaving it behind. After the orphanage we went to the big grocery store. We purchased about $120 worth of groceries and tried to buy similar things like home- fruits, frozen veggies, chicken, pasta sauce, ground beef, and spices. Tatiana helped us pick out some food for the kids as well. In the morning Jones usually has bread with butter and soft cheese on it (this explains the bread, butter, and soft cheese on the plane that we are never sure what to do with) and cottage cheese ( think of our cottage cheese minus the liquid and squished together) mixed with cream and sugar. Yuck. Doesn’t sound good to me but of course I am American and we are not used to that. She also had us by some cocoa puff type cereal. The milk is much sweeter though and comes in a box. For Mollie we bought baby foods and yogurt and an oatmeal type cereal that is ground up. It was an interesting but fun trip. I went upstairs to the other store section and bought a cool pair of shoes as I am in need of some comfort shoes that are not flip flops because it is colder than expected. I saw these shoes last time I was there and thought they would be fun to get and a travel hair straightener as mine would not heat up this morning. Joey and I got back and had tuna snack packs with crackers that I brought from home- not that good.
Around 3pm we went to visit Mollie. It went well. She was quiet at first because I think she had just woken up. She acted like she didn’t know who we were which is weird because we have visited 4 times over the last 2 days. She warmed up quickly and we try to distract her from the ground. She loves the little fruit puff dissolvable cereal we brought. She comes running when she hears me shake the tube full of them. Over all it was a good day. I can’t wait until court on Monday when the kids will be ours and we can start bonding with Mollie and then soon with Jones. I will really try to post pics soon. Not too many of the kids yet. It is hard to take pics when you are playing with them. I am sure all you parents have experienced that.
Keep your calls and emails coming. We love hearing from you. It is a real treat during the day and it helps keep a strong connection with home. Thank you sooooooooooooo much.

$$$$$$$$$$

Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. We needed to exchange money today and we decided on about $4000 hoping that would cover most of our expenses in Kaliningrad. It was so weird, we drove up to this parking lot and these guys passed money in the car 100,000 rubles and our driver Sasha counted it. Once he said it was good we passed the $4,000 out the window and left. Felt a little drug deal shady to us. Crazy! But we have to trust Tatiana. She said everyone knows these guys and it is the best exchange rate. Something we'll remember. I felt like we were in a movie.

Testing Boundaries

Hi Everyone. We miss you soooooooo much. Britt, I haven't heard from you yet!? I talked to Livi and Mom on the phone and sang Livi a song. I miss her. Well, we are doing good. Things felt like perfection this morning. Last night I stayed up really late and organized all the suitcases. good thing too, we are moving tomorrow. This morning I was able to straighten my hair and use many other conveniences. It makes such a difference being on our SECOND trip. We learned what we needed on our first trip. We went to visit the kids this morning. We picked up Jones as usual and went to Mollie's orphanage and played outside. It was challenging. Jones wasn't really interested in the toys (we bring new ones everyday) but he liked the snacks, especially the snacks we brought for Mollie (little fruit cereal puffs.) He respected our backpack full of toys and asked with his actions if he could get inside. Joey said "Da" which means yes. He then felt more comfortable and started to play with the toys. Joey chased him around and they seemed to bond he even rested his arm on Joey on the way back. In the middle of our visit he started climbing up this structure and I would say "Nyet" meaning no and he would laugh. I did it over and over and got down on his level and looked him in the eye and said "Nyet." Joey took over after that and distracted him. Mollie wasn't too happy this morning. She seemed tired. She just wanted to crawl on the grass which she is not allowed to do especially with shorts on.

For our lunch break we walked to 12 chairs which we have been to on our last trip a couple times and we enjoyed our meal, we then went to the grocery store and bought more water and some sausage for our top ramen we are having for dinner. Then we were picked up for our second visit. We picked up Jones and learned that we will have custody of him as of Monday but can choose to pick him up any day. This may seem weird but we may wait a day or two so that we can establish Mollie's schedule first and allow Jones extra time with his friends. He is going camping tomorrow so we will only see him in the morning. We will talk with his caregivers about his schedule and such. I can't wait. It was pouring rain so when we got to Mollie's orphanage we were able to go inside and play in her groups toy room which is only used about 15 minutes a day for psychologist tests, music time, and such. Wow, I was hoping they would get to play each day in there. I can't believe they have all these toys and instead they are stuck in their play pens all day. We had a great time playing and Mollie was walking everywhere on her own. We returned both kids to their group and returned to the hotel and here we are.

Earlier today Tatiana called and said they finally found an apartment but it is $2500 and 4 bedrooms. No thank you!!! We can't afford that. That is more than our mortgage! She said the only other option is her relatives apartment. They are leaving tomorrow morning for Moscow for two months. She said they didn't want to rent it out but she told them we were really young and nice. We felt weird but what choice do we have. We went and visited and I think she liked us. It has one bedroom, one kitchen/laundry, a living room, hall, and bedroom. THe kids will sleep in the living room on a pull out bed. Good news is we will have phone and internet, stove, fridge, and laundry. We move in tomorrow morning and it will be $1000 which is about what we were counting on. We hope this is the right decision. It is not in the location we wanted but it is down the street from a little grocery store and a lake. It is near Tatiana's house. She said we can call if we need anything. I will try to give my mom the phone number tomorrow.

Tonight we are just going to rest and watch a movie and make top ramen. It sounds really good. Email us when you can at missnloveyou@yahoo.com. Talking to all of you by email is like life to us. We love to hear about your daily lives even if it seems boring. It reminds us of home.

We made it to Russia

Well, Hello from Russia! We are here and made it on time (well, 15 minutes late) and safely! We flew from Portland to Frankfurt, Germany on Lufthansa. We left at 1:20pm home time June 11th. We arrived in Germany 8:15am on June 12th. It was a 10 hour flight. We did not have assigned seats so we were assigned the two middle seats in a four person row. We were slightly concerned for comfort reasons but it worked out fine. I sat next to a woman celebrating her 50th anniversary. Her husband, and four children. The first one who was adopted. The children are in their 40’s and none of them have children so they all saved up to go on a 2 week European cruise. Cool huh? Probably won’t see me doing that anytime soon after this or ever but it sounds like a great time. She was very nice. She took my email. They are from Portland and she is excited to see how everything turns out for us. I really enjoyed talking. I don’t usually sit next to people that want to have a conversation (like the person next to Joey) and I have to say it was a nice way to pass the time. We watched Catch and Release and Freedom Writers on the way there. We enjoyed them both. We did not sleep but I did use my neck pillow and loved it! I took one of my valium type pills before the flight. I was still nervous but not freaking out so I think it worked. I got a little scared later and took a second one. Near the end of the flight I took my third. No I was not overdosing. They are only 2mg and the directions say to take one or two every six to eight hours. I took one before each of my two following flights. That is exactly half my pills so I will save the other half for the ride home. I didn’t feel loopy or tired just less worried so that is good.
Our second flight left Germany around 10:50. The Frankfurt airport changed our gate so we had a little confusion but we did fine. We did not have to have any additional checks which is good. We sat for about an hour and a half and waited for our plane. Oh, I forgot to tell you. Joey beeped in the Portland (and Moscow) airports. I don’t know why this always happens! Kind of funny! In Portland my carry on got pulled aside. I had sealed bottles of children’s medicine. They said that was fine. And I had baby food. They said baby food is only allowed if you have a baby. Well, what can I say? I like to eat baby food on the flight? Ha! I explained and he measured and they passed through just fine. He said our kids light up timer toothbrushes were the craziest he had seen. He was really nice. He did have to take away our children’s yummy Little Einstein toothpaste though. Darn, now they have to use our spicy cinnamon. I wish I would have checked that in my suitcase. Oh, well. So not a big deal. Our flight from Germany took Moscow was pleasant as well. A slightly older plane. We were in the exit row with our little steward guy strapped in his little seat next to us during take off and landing. He kind of looked like Moby with glasses and has this cute little funny accent. Joey and I slept. I had taken a Tylenol PM because I knew this was my only chance to get a “good nights sleep.” It was a three hour flight. We woke up to eat a meal but that is all I remember. We arrived In Moscow at 3:50pm. Our flight was 3 hours. It is crazy with all the time changes. You never know how long your flight is until you look it up on your itinerary.
Upon arrival in Moscow we had to wait in Passport Control for over an hour! Very hard to be patient but we got through fine. We were greeted by a different Tatyana, Alex’s mom (Guy Alex is our contact in Moscow although we have yet to meet him on either trip.) She was very nice. She went to get her car and picked us up on the curb. It was soooooooooooo crowded! She said 5 international flights landed at the same time which is why the lines were so long and their were cars parked everywhere!!! She said she had never seen it like that. She also told us that there was a big storm in New York which caused delays in some of the arrivals to Moscow and also that passengers had to wait on a plane in NY for 5 hours and then told they couldn’t take off! Are you kidding me?! I thought we took care of that with the Jet Blue incident! Anyway, she helped us drove us to the other terminal and explained what we needed to do for check-in. It turns out we are one of the first passengers to use the brand new electronic ticket system in Russia. She left and then we waited around for a few hours until our boarding and flight taking off around 8:30. We then boarded our very old Aeroflot plane (scary but not as scary with valium!) I slept for a bit. It was a pleasant hour and half flight. I am telling you- Russian pilots know how to fly!!! They have the smoothest take-offs, flights, and landings then any flights I have taken otherwise. We arrived and the pilot was applauded by the 30 or so passengers. Each flight was older and smaller as we went along. We arrived at 9:15 or 9:30pm Kaliningrad time which is 11:30am home time. So after a total of 24 ½ hours of airports and airplanes, we have touched down for the next 20 days. Finally.
We were picked up by Tatiana (the one we know) and Sasha (Alexander) but not Alexander her father, he is on vacation. Sasha is a young guy and drives a nice Mercedes. He is our driver for this trip. The drove us to the hotel and helped us with our luggage. She told us she would pick us up at 10am to go see the children. We know the drill. No problem. Okay so we went into our room and both of us all of a sudden could not see our little black suitcase that we had carried on! The one that got pulled over in Portland. With the medicine, emergency clothes, some snacks and toys, and…………laptop!!! We freaked out for a second and then prayed. We did not remember loading it in the car. We immediately called Tatiana and she called the airport. They had it!!! Praise God!!! She said Sasha would pick us up at 8:30 am to go pick it up but it would cost extra.( It ended up being $50-soooooooooo worth it, we just gave him 1500rubles which is aprox $60.) We went there this morning not knowing if it would really be there or not and it was! Then they asked for our passports. “Oh no!” The hotel front desk had them because we had to turn them in so they can do our registration which is required by the government. Luckily the woman accepted Sasha’s passport and we were returned our suitcase which still included all of belongings including the laptop! Praise God again! Then we picked up Tatiana and went to Jones’ orphanage. They said he was at the hospital having a hole in his tooth treated. Actually he had four teeth treated. I am assuming it is his 4 upper front black teeth. We will have to get that looked at in America.
We left his orphanage without him and went to see Mollie. She didn’t recognize us but let us play with her. She tried to get down on the grass again. So many little bugs though. We tried our hardest to keep her entertained for an hour but it is hard to do when you don’t speak her language. She would just light up when she saw any of her caregivers or when Tatiana would speak to her. I can only imagine how she feels. I imagine Olivia and two people just taking her and trying to play to her and speaking in Chinese or something. She would probably do the same thing- pretty much ignore us. She likes to be thrown in the air though and she liked when I rocked her and sang “la, la, la.” She would repeat me. She really likes to play with the grass and sticks way better than the toys we brought. She ate three little cookies we brought. She did a really good job. Much better than last time but still had to chew them with her 4 front teeth. We left the orphanage and went back to the hotel for our break. Tatiana ordered us a cheese pizza. We feel too tired today to go out. It was alright. I don’t love it. It is no Papa Murphy’s that’s for sure!
Tatiana was going to call us to go see apartments around 2pm but she called the Russian cell our friends Kevin & Alisa sent us and it was actually in the infamous little black suitcase which we now left in the back of the car!!! Hello! We need to get it together! So we slept, really slept hard, jet lagged drugged like sleep. She called up to the room at 3:10 when she arrived. We were startled and jumped up with impressed lines on our faces and ran downstairs. We explained the confusion. The apartments they found were too far from the city. They are still looking for something. We are supposed to have something to look at tomorrow. Please pray that we find something convenient, affordable, clean, in a good location and the icing would be air conditioning which is rare here! We went and picked up Jones and he seemed happy to see us but didn’t talk at all to us because he knows we don’t speak Russian. He sure talked to Tatiana though. It was an awkward silent drive. He was wearing a pink sweater and pink shoes. Both kids were wearing shorts which if funny because it is colder today than it was last time we were here but I guess it has been very hot recently. He was happy to see his sister but then went off by himself ignoring every attempt we made to play with him. It took him about a half hour to warm up. He did not want to play with any toys. He just wanted to play with sticks and bricks in the back of the yard. We took turns joining him and finally started to bond and he started trying to communicate with us. And Mollie- my goodness. She surprised us and started to walk around by herself! She is so independent. This visit was easier but still a little weird. When it was over we took Jones back to the orphanage. We gave him 2 Hot Wheels cars and some stickers. He liked the stickers but did not want to use them. He kept saying what sounded like “Are you sure?” but in Russian it means “more.” He is persistant! We told him “zaftra” which is tomorrow in Russian. He still kept repeating it. Tatiana said “Don’t spoil him, he is testing your boundaries.” I guess so. We dropped him off and headed back to the hotel.
So overall it has been good so far. It helps when you have been here before and know what to expect and what to bring. Tonight we are just going to eat something little like leftover cold pizza or snacks we brought and watch a movie and go to sleep. Tomorrow we should have the same schedule and Friday also except I think Jones is going on a camping trip with his group. I am so nervous he is going to want to go to his “home” after he is with us. Please pray for quick bonding. I think we get to talk to the caregivers on Friday to find out all their details and schedules and such which I am excited for. Then this weekend we have nothing going on but I am hoping we switch to an apartment and buy groceries and get it all set up for the kids to join us. We also have to study for court. Court is Monday at 10am, we are first! Joey has to give a speech for 5-10 minutes and then the prosecutor will ask questions. All I can say is “I agree with everything my husband says.” This will be interesting. Oh, yeah one more tidbit- we found out today that their mother is pregnant again. This makes me feel weird. Pray if you get a chance.
Thank you Mom for calling. Thank you Alisa and Kevin for leaving us the fan, soccer ball, baby towel, and hot pot and for sending us the cell phone!!! You are a lifesaver! Thank you family and friends for emails and prayers. Thanks Em, Steph, Alisa, April and Tam for your kind words! Well, bye for now. I will write again tomorrow and I am going to try to post just a couple pics in a minute.

Update on the Kids

Tatiana emailed us and let us know that they have not cut Mollie's hair like we asked them not to! Woo Hoo! Barretts and headbands here we come! She said Jones is waiting for us. She has visited a couple times. She bought some fruit for the kids from us. He was very happy and said he likes to look at our pics. We had also emailed additional pics that Tatiana took to the orphanage to show him. She said that he told her he was upset when they took away the clothes we had given him but they explained to him that it was too hot for those clothes. Tatiana told him that we would bring him new clothes. It sounds like he is getting excited! Just like us! We have been praying since the day we found out about them, throughout the trip, and since we have been home that the children would dream of us so they could remember and be anticipation our reunion! I love when Tatiana visits the kids and tells us how they are.

It's Almost Time!

I can't believe it is so long since I have written. Things have been so crazy and busy. It sure takes a lot of work getting two rooms ready and making sure we have everything we need. We are getting there. I just finished putting Jones room together and then today my friend Stephanie and I worked on Mollie's. I just love seeing their little rooms all decorated and cute and waiting. I still have quite a bit of documents to organize and need to start organizing our packing but I am actually feeling like I am acomplishing things today. Yesterday was all paperwork and mailings and applying for our visas. It is an all day process but doesn't feel like you have accomplished that much. Joey is in Seattle doing some classes for his job so I am here working my tushy off! It looks like I might get to have a girls movie night out though which sounds great! My sis and friend Emily put on a huge fundraiser on Sunday-a bunco benefit and it was a great success and so many people came to show their love and support. It brought me to tears. We have also been receiving other donations. I am just so humbled and feel so blessed. I am so thankful. Well, everything seems to be falling in to place. If you are one of our faithful prayer warriors you can pray for continued financial provision, safety, calming of nerves, bonding, and that our preparations can be completed in time. Oh, and grace with the officials, judges, etc. We will try to update our blog frequently from Russia if we can get a good connection. Thank you again family and friends! Hi-ho, Hi-ho, it's off to work I go..........
Love,
Erin

Feelings

So now we are home. My mind has been swirling about me. So many thoughts, so many fears. It has just made me ill. I don't know what I am so worried about. I am soooooooo excited to see our children and bring them home but at the same time I am not looking forward to the long trip. It was really hard. I get really homesick. I also sort of developed a fear for flying. Anyway, I have just been feeling so odd and not at home yet. I think maybe it is because it is a time of transition and our lives are forever changed, in a good way, but none the less - changed. And of course the flying. These feeling have been tormenting me. I love the people of Russia, I love all people but the whole experience and culture and language shock was difficult. I discovered I am not a world traveler. I kept praying and praying against all my fears and nervousness and I knew God was with us even here once we were home and he was answering prayers and keeping us safe and helping with the bonding but still I could not shake it. I am happy to say that finally today I am free! I feel confidant moving forward, I feel strengthened to face the challenges of the future and the travels. I feel so much better. I spent a lot of time waiting on the Lord this morning and it was wonderful. He has given me peace. I debated whether or not to write this blog and I decided to do it and be honest. So many are walking this journey with us and I am so grateful for the the support, prayer,and finances! I felt I owed it to everyone to be completely transparent in the journey during hard times and great times. To sum it up- now it's all good.

Feelings

St. Petersburg

Our last couple days were spent with our tour guide Alex (female) and driver Igor. They were very kind. In St. Petersburg there is so much history and sooooooooooo many museums that to be a tour guide you need a license. She worked very hard to get hers and she said she is lucky to be employed because many do not find jobs before their license expires. She knew so much knowledge and imparted so much history on us. We visited Pushkin, Pavlosk's Palace, Catherine the Great's Palace, The Cathedral of Nicholos the II, St. Isaac's Cathedral, The Hermitage Museum, President Putin's favorite restaurant, The Church on Spilled Blood, The place where Rasputin was killed, and many more. We learned about all the leaders of Russia and their families- Peter the Great, Paul, Alexander, Catherine the Great, Elizabeth, etc. We viewed the Amber Room, Palaces, original works by Leonardo Da Vinci, Raphael, Michaelangelo, Matisse, Picasso, etc. It was pretty incredible and overwhelming. We also learned about the seige on Lenigrad (then changed to St. Petersburg) during WWII which was extremely sad. We ate at some good restaurants and enjoyed our comfortable hotel. It was really hot in the hotel though. Alex said they were flattering their guest by having the heat on. Well,I felt trapped- you couldn't open the window and no heat control in the room! Aah! But it ended up being fine. It is much colder in St. Petersburg and Moscow than Kaliningrad. Kaliningrad was kind of like home but it actually snowed in St. Petersburg the day we left. Our airport experiences were much better on the way home. Everything went smoothly- Kaliningrad to St. Petersburg to Moscow to Los Angeles to Portland. 17 hours flight time! 24 hours in travel! I felt like I was still flying, my body trying to balance, the entire day after arriving home.

Decisions

Before we left we were asked to make the decision whether to adopt the children or not. Of course we said yes! We signed the paperwork and stated our decision to the Ministry of Education and the Court. We were then given a court date of June 15th. Wow- that was quick! We will be traveling (most likely a different route this time) on June 9th. We will spend three weeks in an apartment in Kaliningrad. We must spend 5 days with the kids visiting their orphanges before court, go to court on the 15th, and then spend 10 more days (actually 14 or so because of all the paperwork processing) in Kaliningrad until the court decree is final. We may or may not have the children with us during that time. Most likely we will. Then we travel to Moscow for two days to finalize everything and obtain their visas at the Embassy and then we will return home July 3rd- just in time for Independance Day! By the way- The day after the 10th day- the court decree is final is exactly 9 months to the day that they were conceived in my heart. God is a God of meaning and confirmation and planning isn't He? We also were given the option to change their birth date and place of birth. We have declined. We had to write down their new given names so the court documents could be prepared. We decided on Jones Ellis Jones because it is totally unique and close to Joey's name and Ellis which means "The Lord is M God." For Masha we have chosen Mollie Joy. Mollie stems from Mary & Maria along the same lines as Masha and it means "wished for" and Joy because of the joy that she brings, J=Jesus first, O=Others second, Y=Yourself last, and also similarity to Joey's name as she is proving herself to be Daddy's girl.

Our Children

Tuesday morning Tatiana and her father picked us up at our hotel. We first had another appointment with the Ministry of Education and then they took us to the baby home. We met with the in-house physician as well as the director of the orphanage. As they were talking to us and telling us about Marya (pronounced Masha) they just brought her in and sat her right on Joey's lap. She looked nothing like her picture but still very cute and was much smaller than I expected so at first it was shocking. She didn't cry, she just sat there a little tense and shy but very calm. After just a few minutes she started opening up and smiling like a little flower. They tried to continue the meeting but it was very hard as we were more entertained by her so our listening skills were not at their best. We then went outside and played with her for about an hour. It was really amazing. I just couldn't get over how much she looks like Joey. The staff said to him "You must have been in Russia before!" Ha ha! They also kept saying "You can't take her, we love her, she's our favorite." We quickly learned why. She is very easy going and cheerful. She has a very pleasant disposition. We quickly learned that she does also have a very persitant spirit as well. All she wanted to do was get on the ground but we were not allowed to set her down in the grass because they said it was too cold and dirty but she tried all kinds of tricks like dropping her toys just to get closer to the grass. It was a little ackward because here we are entertaining this beautiful one-year-old trying to soak it all in while being observed in this unkept yard with only the toys we brought and a couple stumps to sit on. We were used to it by the end of the week but it was odd at first. Then it was time to leave.

After our afternoon break they picked us up again and we went to the older orphanage to meet Vadim (more commonly referred to as Vadick such as Joey is to Joseph.) We spoke with his teach for quite some time and then the director and doctor. Both children are extremely healthy although Masha did have a cold and passed it to Vadick. His teacher explained that he is very outgoing and likes to be the center of attention. She said he is very smart and likes to explain everything. They say he is the last one sitting at the table at every meal because he likes to talk about everything. They say he adapted very quickly to the orphanage. The plan was to bring him in with a friend, get aquainted, and then they would ask him if he would like to come back again, and eventually tell him about the adoption. They brought him in and my first thought was that he was so cute and sooooooo small. Of course they brought him in with a stocky 7-year-old friend who we were also quite taken by however Vadick is very small. We talked for awhile although we couldn't talk much directly to the kids except through Tatiana because of the language barrier but we did give them goldfish crackers and Hot Wheels cars which they liked very much. Afterward they asked him if he would like to visit again and go see his sister tomorrow. He said yes. He left the room and then we were bombarded with questions. They obviously really care where he is going which made us feel very good. We showed them the picture book of our home and family and they were very pleased after that.

That night we went to a little restaurant called 12 Chairs. It was really cool, cave like, and romantic although after awhile it felt a little claustrophobic especially with all the smoking (it would never pass code in the USA.) It was located below a theatre in a beautiful old building. We had a hard time communicating of course but the menu did have everything in English so we received what we ordered. I was not feeling well so I just had a vegetable soup covered with a blanket of dill and Joey had a Mexican chicken. That was something I read in a travelers book- in Russia they do not use a lot of spices so to us everything seemed a bit bland but they do LOVE dill and it is on everything! I found this to be quite true in most cases.

On Wednesday we went and picked up Vadick and drove to the orphanage to see Masha. It was so neat to see them together. He just observed her and his eyes were just smiling at her. He started to get more used to us too and smiled up at me as I rubbed his back (caught it on video!) I asked Tatiana to ask him what he thought of Masha and he said he thought she would be bigger by now and able to play more. He liked her though. It's funny, I thought he might imagine her smaller because the last time they were together she was only 2 months old. Anyway- it is such a pleasure to be used of God to reunite the two. We were in a small room and it was pretty loud because there was another family there. They are from Tennessee. It was refreshing to communicate. They were on their second trip waiting for court so they could take their little girl home. We ended up seeing them and talking with them during every morning and afternoon visit which made things much more tolerable. They had so much good advice for us as this is their second time through the process. They had adopted their son (who was so cute and was with them- southern drawl and all) a couple years prior. You would never even know he was adopted. He fit so well into their family. At 12:00 we had to end our visit because the orphanages never deviate from their schedules and the kids have lunch at 12 and nap from 1-3pm. We had another similar visit in the afternoon from 3-5pm. This time we played outside. Vadick didn't want to do much- just observe. Joey let Masha hold a stick and Vad kept repeating something in Russian and finally Tatiana said that he was saying " Be careful with that stick, she could get hurt." So sweet, melted our hearts. He then proceeded to remove every stick from the play yard. He did enjoy the bubbles we brought a lot though, they were a big hit!

On Thursday Vadick's orphanage would not let him leave because he had a temperature (caught from Masha.) He was also separated from his group but he was okay with that. We just played on his playground and brought out more toys which he was very happy about. More cars, balls, sidewalk chalk, etc. We really had to entice him to play. He just wanted to observe which I totally understand. He also was very protective of the toys we had given him. Joey played ball with him for awhile and then I sat on the bench with him and we worked on communicating with the little Russian I have studied and learned. We also went though a baby book with pictures and I asked him "What is that?" in Russian and he would tell me and I would repeat it. I think we will be using this technique a lot in the beginning. It was definately a bonding moment. I did get him to say one English word, shoe. At the end of our visit Tatiana asked him if he would like to live in a place with all of his own new toys to which he said "I have lots of toys." Then she asked him if he would like to live in a family forever with his sister and if he liked us. He was rocking with his head down, on his feet, but in sort of a fetal position (because he was playing with his cars on the ground) and he contemplated it and said "yes." We were so happy. At this point he did not want anything to do with the picture book we had brought nor did he want his picture taken. I had to sneak around to get pictures of him. It was kind of a good thing that we didn't go to the other orphanage because the time alone with him was very defining for our family and neccessary for our bonding. He is very fluent in his language and would hold long conversations with Tatiana so it was hard for us at times especially as I kept thinking of the challenges that lay ahead and I long for him to continue speaking and not feel like he has to be mute just because we can't understand. His voice is so pleasant, and quiet, and raspy. That afternoon we visited Masha and tried to play outside again. She was so hot. They bundle them up so much with sweaters and heavy jackets and hats even though it is like 70 degrees out. All we wanted to do was get all those clothes off her but we followed the rules.

Friday was our last day. Also during the week we had many more appointments such as the Ministry of Education, Court and the Chief of Staff at the Children's Hospital.

We picked up Vadick and had a nice morning visit at the baby home and then took him back to his orphanage and we were able to go inside for a quick second and see the little room he was staying in with another sick child. They had two twin beds that looked cozy and a little table with all the toys he had collected from us throughout the week. Oh I forgot to mention he is really good at sharing his food. Tatiana tried to get him to take off his socks and shoes so we could trace his foot and know what size shoe to buy him but he refused even after bribing him with yet another car and threatening to get his caregiver. He really didn't want to so the caregiver brought us a shoe that fits him well to trace. But then surprisingly he tried on the shirt and pants we brought him in exchange for a car. The shirt a 4T fit well but the pants 4T as well were way too big. I don't know how much shopping we will do before hand because it was hard to tell plus some brands are different. I will probably buy him a couple 3T's and mostly 4. He finally took an interest in the book of our home and family and I got to go through it with him in his language explaining that it is his new home, grandma, grandpa, etc. He seemed excited although he may have been showing off for his friend. I had Tatiana tell him that we loved him and would come back for him in 7 weeks and that we don't speak Russian but we are trying and we hope he will try English also. I gave him a hug and we left. It was difficult to leave but not quite as hard as I expected because I do know that he is happy there and they do take good care of him.

We drove to the baby home for our last visit with Masha. She was happy as usual. We asked to stay inside and surprisingly it was the first time we were alone. Just Joey, Masha, and myself. We played with her and took lots of video. We walked her around the room and tried on the clothes I brought for her. They were too big as well. I think she is probably 12 months clothing but I will probably buy her 18-24 so she has room to grow. She has little feet too. We had a very nice bonding time and I undressed her feet which was fun. She had on shoes, socks and tights wadded up in the socks. I showed her belly to her and she liked that. I raspberried her tummy and I think she thought I was nuts but she did smile when I tickled her. We went through the picture book with her also and she looked intently at it. We left one for each of them along with all they toys, clothes, and snacks. It was a nice visit. She likes to laugh. Then it was time to go. Tatiana said if we were sneaky, we could take her back to her group. We weren't supposed to go in because it is under construction (but her area wasn't.) Tatiana said next trip we will get to spend more time in the orphanages and also with the caregivers. We went upstairs and saw her groups quarters. It was very nice. They had a nice toy room, a room with all the beds and a couple play pens with no toys, a little kitchen with tables and chairs, and a potty room. I think it was potty training time so two at a time the children sit on their own potty chair until they go. The rest of the children wait in the boring play pens. We sat her in her chair and took a picture and then I was told I could set her in her crib and take her picture. I sat her down and she started crying hysterically and threw herself down on her blankets. We had not seen this side of her. It clarified two things to me- #1 We have some major challenges ahead, and #2 my heart broke- obviously she does not enjoy that crib which makes me wonder how much time she spends there. I picked her up immediately and she clung to me digging her nails into my skin. It was so good to hold her and so devestating to see her like this. A few minutes later she was playing with the toys we brought in a play pen. We said good bye. It was a little harder because of the meltdown situation. I was crying quietly. We learned that there is one caregiver to 10 children in Vadick's orphange and one to 15 in Masha's. All of the baby's except Masha had their head shaved. Please pray that they don't cut it. It is beautiful and I would like to continue to let it grow.

Overall meeting our children was an amazing experience. We cannot wait to get them home in the USA and in our home.

Safe & Sound!

Wow, where do I begin? What an experience. We left on April 20th headed to Russia to meet our children for the first time. If I am going to be completely transparent I will tell you that the first half of the trip was extremely trying and difficult and the second half was wonderful. The Lord saw us through it all and answered all of our prayers. We met our children which has forever changed us in the best way possible and our home now does not feel home without them.

The first plane rides were very difficult. I don't know what is wrong with me but in the last few years I have developed quite a little fear of flying. I prayed and breathed my way through the beginning of each flight as my heart pounded rapidly through my chest. I continued to ask myself and anyone that was nearby, "What is my problem?!" Never did I figure it out but regardless the Lord provided us with safe flights. We took off from Portland and flew to Los Angeles and then Los Angeles to Moscow. This is where the problems arose. NO ONE spoke english but acted like they did. There was a customs and passport control line that we were told to stand in. We stood for almost an hour knowing we would probably miss our flight which was set to take off two hours within our landing in Moscow. When we arrived at the front of the line, the lady seemed annoyed with us and told us to go to baggage. We didn't need to be in that line! At this point we were looking for a guy- Alex with our names on a sign. There were others with signs but not ours. We waited and collected our baggage and then began to panic. When I finally saw Joey get to that point then I really started freaking out. I just wanted to use a phone! We couldn't read the signs, no one spoke english and we didn't know our way out! Finally I saw the line to claim what you are bringing into the country, we were told there that we could just go through because we were not bringing in over $10,000. Whew. We walked out and there was our sign. It was not Alex but Pasha. Pasha said "What happened?" He had been waiting over two hours. I tried to explain the situation but we had to hurry to catch our back-up flight to St. Petersburg after missing our first flight. The domestic terminal is in a different location so we drove there and ran in literally running, injuries obtained. They wouldn't accept us, they said check-in was closed. Then they made an exception and sent us running upstairs without Pasha (couldn't go past security) and when we went upstairs they said "No, go downstairs" in broken english. There was no use explaining. The communication was not working. We missed the flight. Pasha then toted us all around the airport to different counters to figure out what to do. we could either buy $600 tickets to leave that night on another airline or stay the night in Moscow and fly for no additional cost. Well, we felt $600 was way too much and we didn't feel we could bear another flight after flying for 15 hours. Pasha booked our new morning flight and we ended up receiving a free hotel stay at the Holiday Inn in Moscow because our flight had been delayed about 10 minutes or so coming in! Thank you Jesus! Pasha took us to the hotel and we had a late night dinner that we were told was free but was not. Oh, well. The room was free. Then the melt down occured. I was so disturbed. I really need to calm down. I'm trying. Actually just talking about it is helping. Anyway that night I was shaking and crying and soooooo homesick. I thought, if something happened to us, no one would no where we are. We are not on our schedule. I just wanted to touch base with home. (I didn't realize that I actually had severe underlying anxiety about meeting our children that would disappear once we met.) I tried to call home but I did not have the country code which I though might be 1 but Russia is 077 or something so I didn't think 1 could possibly be it. I called the front desk and asked and they said "We don't know, it's your country." The next morning Pasha picked us up and we took off to St. Petersburg. When we arrived Alex (female) & Igor picked us up. They were right there which was a huge relief. We had a few hours before our flight to Kaliningrad so she took us to the hotel that we were supposed to be at the night before to rest for a few hours because we had to pay for it anyway because we didn't cancel in time. This was fine with us, we felt like we were in heaven. We plugged in the laptop and emailed home and it was a very comfortable room and large hotel. They picked us up a few hours later and we hopped our flight to Kaliningrad.

Our flight arrived early but Tatiana (our AAI contact) and her father Alexander arrived shortly. It was a very small airport with military looking men allowing us off the plane into the airport. Tatiana introduced herself and we drove to the hotel. On the way, we saw this park full of families, and trees, and ponies with pink hair. It was crazy, very idyllic, like a fantasy. It was a children's park. The city of Kaliningrad is much larger than I expected. She took us to the Hotel Chaika which has 24 rooms. It was fairly simple but in a nice neighborhood and very clean. She left us and let us know she would pick us up in the morning to visit the Department of Education. Since no agencies are accredited in Russia we have to attend every meeting and complete our adoption independantly (with AAI by our side assisting us at every turn.) She showed us a couple stores and restaurants with English speaking menus within walking distance and then left us to settle in. We were celebrating. No more flying for 5 days!!! We get to meet our children!!!

On Tuesday we met with the Ministry of Education and told him what we were looking for. He had them check the files and of course they brought in the files on our children. Mollie (Masha/Marya) looked totally different. I questioned whether it was the same child. He gave us some background information on their family and circumstances and we agreed to meet them. He said he would have approval in the morning. We went back to the hotel for the rest of the day. I was sick all these days. A little physically but mostly mentally. Again I repeat- I don't know what was wrong with me. Maybe part jet lag and part nerves. Wow, I was a mess. I think we walked to a restaurant that day called 12 Chairs. It was really cool down below an old theatre. After awhile it got a little claustrophobic. It would never pass code in the USA but it was good food and a good experience none the less. I forgot to mention that the first night in Kaliningrad Tatiana ordered us pizza to our room. We ordered half canadian bacon with pineapples and it also came with bananas- ewhh! We also found out that none of the converters we brought worked so again we were disconnected from the world and all our modern conveniences we brought (computer, DVD's, hot pot, hair straightener, etc.) would be of no use.

In the afternoon Tatiana took us to meet our children. (This is a picture of our hotel and our pizza.)

We're off!

We are leaving for Russia tomorrow. It has been quite a circus to get to this point which is why I have not blogged lately. We are waiting for our passports and visas to come tomorrow morning before we leave. Talk about Stress! But talk even more about FAITH! It is all coming together. I will write more about our experience with travel arrangements later. Right now, I gotta go! I can't believe we will actually be in the presence of our little ones in just a couple days!

A Boy & A Girl!

Well, God has doubled our blessing. We received two new referrals on Tuesday! We only received their pictures, names, and ages. Today we received more info but still not much medical. We will not know anything more until we travel. It is really a miracle the way it came about though especially the swiftness. Thank you so much for your prayers- God is listening and honoring them.

Our consultant informed us that the Dept of Child Care in Russia asked them if they had families for three sets of siblings. They said yes. This is how it came about. These children are not from Ark where we are registered (please pray that this will not cause additional trouble or time delays as you can remember we had to be registered before AAI's accreditation was up, it is now.) They are from Kaliningrad so I am not sure how this will work. As far as I have heard there have not been adoptions out of there (international) since possibly even 2002. But God knows how to work it doesn't he. He had children specifically chosen for us and he found a way to make it happen anyway! Again please pray for ease of process from here on out.

Vadim will be 5-years-old in August. He has light brown hair and brown/hazel eyes. He seems shy, he is not looking at the camera. We are told he is open hearted and kind. He likes to play with cars. He knows he has a sister (Maria) and he remembers her(they are at different orphanages.) The only medical issues it listed was enlarged tonsils, flat foot, and developmental delays from being institutionalized (they all do.)

Maria is 15 months. She was born in Dec. of 2005 (one month younger than my niece- how cute!) She also has light brown hair and brown/hazel eyes. She has a sparkle in her eyes and a gigantic smile. We are told she is kind and is most loved in her group ( I don't know if they mean by caregivers or peers but we did pray that they would be a favorite and well cared for.) She likes to play with her peers. They said the developmental delay she has is speech and that she can only speak in small phrases (What? Most of the children I know this age speak one word at a time so I can't believe they consider phrases a delay.) She can dress and feed herself and is potty trained. They don't think she remembers her brother. I bet she will feel it though.

We are so excited and cannot wait to meet our children face to face. We are beginning to set up their rooms and imaging them in our home. We know this is going to be a HUGE challenge especially at first especially with the language barrier. We are studying harder than ever.

Thank you so much for walking with us on this amazing journey. We could best use prayer in the areas of wisdom (is this right), safety (in travel and our hearts-Please let this one stick Lord), finances (two is more than one), patience (can't wait to see their faces in person), memory (for the Russian language), and endurance (to make it through no matter what the challenge.)

Heartbreak

Just a quick update. I just found out that Christina is being adopted by a Russian family. I don't know what to feel right now. I am kind of in shock, heartbroken, and numb. I know God has a plan and has this designed already and I am at peace with that. It is just hard to understand why we would be allowed to fall in love with her already so I am just trying to wrap my mind around that. We will always pray for her and her life regardless. So we will now go back to the waiting stage. I am just praying that our loss of Christina does not hold us back from falling in love with a new child or two. I am happy that Christina has a family that wants her and happy that now more children can be adopted but at the same time I grieve a daughter which was loaned to us for such a short time. We just bought her bedroom furniture yesterday so I think we might wait on stuff like that next time.

A Little Girl!

So finally we have some exciting news! We are going to have a little girl! We received the call and email yesterday that a referral was ready for us. She is adorable. Her name is Christina and she is 29 months old. She weighs aprox 24 lbs and is 31 inches tall. She has big blue eyes and chubby cheeks. She did not go to the orphanage until she was 18 months old. She is her birth mom's only child. Her birth mom is 28 years old and no father is unknown. I don't know why she brought Christina to the orphanage but most likely poverty could be the reason. I know the greater reason... Christina was created to be our daughter! Christina can understand picture books and answers simple questions and can say simple words. She knows her shapes and is at her appropriate skill level for her age. She can walk, run, eat, and poop well we are told. We are so excited to meet her. What a blessing. I wasn't even imaging a little girl because I was told more boys are available. This is a dream come true. She has a beautiful pink, black, and white room waiting for her and the funny thing is last week I just bought bedding for that room. Turns out she is not in the home that I posted earlier but she is in the Kotlas area of Arkangelsk. Please be praying for our smooth and safe travel which should be taking place in a week or two for the first visit and be praying for our precious little girl. They are 11 hours ahead. So when we are going to bed we pray for her morning and day and as we wake we pray for her sweet dreams. We are thinking of naming her Mollie Christina. Mollie means "wished for" and Christina (her Russian given name) means "annointed, follower of Christ." Seems fitting, doesn't it? :)

Something to believe in!

Soooooooo............... Yes! Being approved was enough to send our dossier (documents) to Russia and I overnighted signatures yesterday so hopefully they will start translating by the end of the week! Our adoption consultant did give me a hint yesterday though- something to believe in, something real and tangible! She said they are working on registering us in the Arkhangelsk region of Russia. Yeah- I can finally look up info and research! And pictures! There are pictures of all the buildings we will have to visit to finalize everything over there and hotels, etc. But most importantly- a picture of the orphanage. My heart melts just seeing the building where OUR baby/babies may actually be right now. This baby home (as they are called) houses 120 children in the Arkhangelsk region ages 0-4. I posted that picture for your viewing pleasure as well. Things are moving - they really are. Keep praying and hoping with us. Thank you so much for your support and love and fundraising ideas. Our hearts are grateful and excited.

Why does there always have to be a but.........?

So our funding was approved through a program that works with our adoption agency for but............ it will not be "funded" until signatures are collected and AAI asks for the money but..........we are approved! So I emailed Lisa our adoption coordinator to see if that approval is enough to send our packet to Russia by tomorrow's (updated) deadline. (What a gift of Love that would be in time for Valentines.)She said she would check into it. PLEASE PRAY! I am praying and hoping and begging that this be enough. After all the bank does work with the agency on this program and they approved us so it's pretty much guaranteed right? I really really do trust God on this and if it is not meant for now it is not meant for now. This was His plan and I believe that nothing I or anyone else can do will interupt that and I believe it will be blessed. But.........right now I feel like I am in a "choose your own adventure" book- Did I send off the dossier on the right day? Should I not have sent it return receipt? Should I have attempted funding elsewhere? Should I have not applied at all and just waited upon the Lord until tomorrow waiting for a miracle just in the nick of time? I don't know. I have to rest in the decisions we have made and the direction we have taken. Oh, Lord please allow this to be gentle on my heart, whatever the outcome. I trust you and I love you and most of all I thank you.

THANK YOU!

Thank you Anggi & Jason for your prayers, support, and financial gift. We are forever grateful. I know you taking part in a miracle that God is putting together to pull us through this hiccup. May it return ten-fold.

Whew! And Oh No!

So............things are good and things are not so good right now. The good news is we have apostilled (certifying that all our notarized documents are valid) all of the documents required for our dossier (the initial packet to be sent to Russia.) I took it to the post office today and had it overnighted so it should arrive on Monday, one day before the extended deadline. Whew! What a relief! That feels WONDERFUL!

What is not so wonderful is the funds that were supposed to accompany that packet did not so I am not sure if they will process it or not. There is a deadline of 2/13 for everything to be turned in so it can have time to reach Russia and have us registered in a specific region by March 1st. Our agency's accreditation expires that day but history has proven that if we can at least be registered by then, Russia will let us finish our adoption. Our agency is one of 14 left working there which are all expiring. Russia has accepted renewal applications but will not be complete for who knows how long. So the goal was to have everything in so at least we would be in process and not waiting indefinately. All the ways we have of paying for this next group of fees due for that to be processed is not happening. I shouldn't say not happening but delayed. Unfortunately, this deadline does not allow for delays so today we applied for special funding. We will see if it works.

Please stand along side us and pray, pray, pray that some way, some how this comes together by Tuesday. I believe that no matter what stands in our way God will make a way (where there seems to be no way) after all, this was His idea. But if His plan is for us to wait, then we will. So in that case pray for my heart.

Anyway- that is the latest. We are on edge. ????? In the meantime if you have any fundraising ideas that you think could be beneficial for us to raise the rest of our funds that we will need for placement fees, travel, orphanage donations, etc. please let me know. I also just earned my Real Estate License so if anyone needs me for advice or to assist in buying or selling a home. I am here- motivated, trustworthy, & hard working. Thanks for listening. It could be getting exciting soon!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love,
Erin